Success and Our Inner Critic
I have this tendency to criticize everything I do. Well, don’t most of us? Our inner critic’s standard is pretty high but that creates tension in our minds and bodies.
We focus on tomorrow instead of the now and that’s not helping anything. That inner critic can also make us think the world we want to be part of-is against us. We all want to fit in, somewhere-someplace but what’s the point of that? Does fitting in stop you from standing out? I don’t know. I guess that depends on the person.
What does your inner critic say?
Mine says-“You have an uphill climb if you want to be a well-known female session fiddler.” That is a really high standard. Think about the females who have come before me? There’s not many.
My inner critic also says—“Why bother?”
Talk about a low and deep burn to the confidence! Geeeeeez inner critic!
The third thing my inner critic says is—“You are just as good as anyone else. It isn’t about the others-be yourself.” I like that one a little bit.
Now, with being yourself comes those question again...Do you want to fit in or stand out? If you don’t know-ask yourself...Does being yourself allow you to do both? Probably not.
Are you results driven? Are you a scientist or a musician? Do you care about data or creating something bigger than yourself? If you are results driven, why play music for a living? Think about why you create music.
Making music for a living is hard. The business is more than difficult-it can break a person— force them to go into another profession and never play music again. I’ve seen it happen. This is where redefining success comes into play. There are so many levels of success in music. Being the star is what most people go for and then they realize it takes more than a pretty voice. If you are focused on the goals of tomorrow instead of today-the now...then maybe start thinking about the little successes you have each moment of the day. If you want to be “the star,” do it. Work hard but work smart. Don’t look at someone who is better than you as competition. They don’t care. If you want to compete-compete with yourself. Up your game. Throw that harmful inner critic against the wall and say- “I’m in control and I will succeed.” Reach beyond the moon and if you land somewhere in the sky-maybe around Mars or Jupiter and you are happy—you’ve redefined your success. (It’s good to have some in-the-now, tomorrow, and long-term goals though.)
If your dreams don’t scare you—then they aren’t big enough. (Don’t quote me on that...I read it somewhere and stole it. Lol!) It’s completely true.
So, do you want to fit in?
Do you want to be a results-driven scientist instead of musician?
Do you want your inner critic to control you?
I'd rather stand out.
I’m definitely not a scientist! Ha!
And no, my inner critic will not control me because I am refining and redefining my views on success-always.
Maybe-if I’m lucky...I’ll end up around Saturn. Possibly prettier than the moon. :)
Make beautiful music or at least your kind beautiful music!
Fiddle on my friends!